Book 12

hello...welcome to Book 12

Sally E-H.

Apparently it's "Sings just for the band." I always thought it was "seamstress for the band" which makes sense because it's Elton John.

Let your enormous, hairy thighs keep you warm!

Rob C.

They are very articulate about their inability to get it together.

Otters are not people.

Computer analysts are extremely charismatic people.

Many things suck. Paris Hilton sucks. Therefore all things are sucked by Paris Hilton.

Casey D.

I only remember one day in sixth grade and a little bit of yesterday!

Me

A girl falls in love with a vampire and he falls in love with her. He's gorgeous. He's romantic. He does everything right and the right speed to make a relationship. Then they go on great adventures. So, aside from the fac that he's a vampire, it's total fiction.

I wish real people would like me.

No one should ever see their teacher's falsies.

I think I have a letter E up my nose.

I'm so tired everything smells like lilacs.

The vampires you sent were delicious!

Tonight the role of coffee will be played by Pepsi

Kylie

"Hey there, Sassy!" Me. "Quatch?" Kylie

Emily H.

I don't have hepatitis, I'm just clean! (Moscow water is often quite yellow).

I really should be doing laundry right now--not going to the mall. I hate myself! I hate myself!!

Daniel M.

Leader I will not be.

Once you stop caring about stuff it gets a whole lot easier.

Ben S.

It just proves how much God loves you and isn't really worried about the rest of us.

Book 11

Book 11

Terry C.

The sun never sets on badass!

I made THIS!!

Ed B.

I've got brain freeze!! I've forgotten the protocol for drinking a slushy!

Kylie J.

Where did you grow up--backwards emphasis land?

I don't want to have to corral my bazongas into a stupidass orange halter top!!

Beer and Jesus, they go hand in hand.

I'll just imagine I'm wallpaper.

Not only am I old, but I'm cheap too!

I can be sad that a mime died!!

"Admit it, you love being in Maaike-land!" Me. "Yes, it's just like Disneyland...if Disneyland was in a psych ward!" Kylie.

Daniel, the other white friend.

Me

This is ranking very high on the seven levels of suck.

I guess it's true what they say, unlucky in love, lucky in gluesticks.

I'm a bunny with a swingset!

Espresso tastes like Hanukkah!

Randy D.

I personally believe that the first few centuries of the afterlife will be spent in deep and intensive therapy to help us get over the trauma of life. I just hope my insurance covers it.

Sally E-H.

Bless his cranky, anal, uncommunicative heart!

Fascists come in all different flavors.

Emily H.

We've got a 'so-what' factor.

Rose K.

The only scientific thing about ti was that they were scientists.

Subtext will bite you in the ass every time.

I will not be satiated by your placebo, you heartless bitch!

David E-H.

He has written what is technically known as a butt-load of plays.

Elizabeth S.

Heathen, mouth-breathing, unwashed freshmen!

Daniel M.

How'd you make the squirrel mad?

You'll probably like it too, because it has to do with poo.

The campus looks so different when you're not staring at the ground.